This is something I am running into more and more. When blogging touches real life or more like you are at the grocery store and someone says, “I loved your blog yesterday…” and follows with a compelling story of their own. I have been a blogger most of my adult life and had many blogging monikers. Can you say sentimental momma, momma’s on the edge and the best thought out Shannon424. And those are just my personal ones. I have had cooking ones, academic ones and the list goes on. All of them fit me with who I was at the time. A new mom, a fat mom, a city girl in a country town, a cook trying to cook more and save my family money but all of them were only a bit of me.
Momma’s on the Edge was the closest I got to being real though. Then when it got real and got readers and a following I got scared. I had some “strange” followers that freaked me out and rightfully so because I had to answer questions about them for the FBI (another story another time). Then, I presented at a conference about being a Mommy Blogger and an Academic. Then my life changed. I am not sure why. My blog started touching my real life and the thought that I was writing for more than just me scared me. I was worried what I had to say had to be really important and make others want to come back and my writing turned to cheese. So I quit. I made it private and had an audience of maybe four that were personally invited. It was always a regret I had though.
Then in the spring I made the commitment again to blog. I love to blog, I love to write but never again would I write for an audience like I did back then. This here blog is for me. I get to say what I want, however I want to say it. And sure you are in my mind and I am aware an audience exists. Hell what kind of a writing teacher would I be if I didn’t acknowledge the very audience awareness I pound into my students heads daily.
The weirdest thing though is when I look at how you got here with search terms like “no”, “stuff” and “green” and I scratch my head and say really? Gosh I hope I live up to those super valuable words and provide you with your much needed answers to them. Those all must be words I use way too much! The funny thing is my students are always giving me a hard time about writing with too big of words. They are obviously not reading here.
This time though I am more mature as a writer and better at putting myself out there. Remember I am a grad student, it is my job to put myself out there. But now I am comfortable with who I am as a wife, mother, daughter, student, sister, friend and etc. All those fricking labels I carry those people love me no matter what I do. So I can come here and spout my BS about no, green and stuff and you can click the red x or you stay and maybe giggle a little or fall asleep and I kind of don’t care. Either way…if I see you in grocery please just call me Shannon and not MR.