I guess at the start of every school year there is an adjustment, right? Add in that you are in a brand spanking new school and add more stress. Hello here folks, this is me. I guess it is one of those things like parenting, you can say it over and over again but you don’t get it till you are living it. And folks, I am living it.
I am so in love with my job. I love being there, working with the kids and teaching them. I feel it in my bones, soul and their faces. They get it, they are engaged. I make mistakes. I actually probably make quite a few daily. Instead, of covering them up, ignoring them or blaming them on others I have just started claiming them. The only person expecting me to know it all and do it all is myself.
But finally in the last two weeks it is starting to feel like we are doing our thing. They come in so excited what we are gonna do next and how I will relate these hard to understand Victorian novels to their life. Sure I am busy but I see it happening. My main focus teaching them that they are already readers and writers and they just need to fine tune it. Their faces when I say that are like, huh?
We are about three weeks into our newspaper and yearbook and they are both student lead groups and their is magic there and I am just facilitating it. It is awesome. I don’t even know what else to say. I picked the leaders and they lead. They want to work. They want to please me and they want to be proud of the end product. We all do!
Sure I am really busy, but I am finding a balance. School work, being a wife, mom and student seems to be slowly coming. Some days harder than others. The hard part is the social part. I never realized how attached to my old world I was. This academic world that I have been in for the last 11 years where we had conversations about composition theory and where we were gonna go for our PhDs.
Now I teach in school with professionals who don’t really know that world and that isn’t to a fault. It is just the setting I am in. It is different. So when we talk about the things teachers and k12 educators talk about I try and incorporate what I do know and can. But honestly, sometimes I can’t. It just isn’t my world yet. It is becoming my world sure but now it just makes me miss my previous community.Mostly because in that community I was respected for what I brought to it and worked with others on moving it forward. I am doing the same in this community but I gotta prove myself again. I gotta earn that respect again.
That I suppose is the last and final transition that I will and am making. The social side of working somewhere else. It has been a long time since I worked so closely and tightly in a community. Thankfully, I love everyone I work with. They are great leaders, teachers and people. To most that know me will probably be surprised when I say this, but when I am out of my comfort zone I don’t thrive. Meaning I am the guy in the back of the room trying to not get noticed. In this new setting I cannot do that. I need to lead and not just take it all in until I can break out of my shell.
It is all a process and in the wise words of countless others….this too shall pass.