The one where I cry – Part 2 (Family Edition)

WARNING: Pic heavy and long….

Saving the best for last…my amazing family. The ones I don’t talk about near like I used to. I have a few reasons, most of which I have discussed before, but mostly to protect their privacy. Now that they are getting older they have the right to not want to publicly be all over my blog.

When they were younger and I was writing about young motherhood and the things they were doing it was more simple. But now they are becoming individuals and finding their passions in life and quest for figuring out who they are I feel like I need to remain mum on those topics.

Of course, I believe them to be amazing. This past year as I tackled my own insecurities and inadequacies they stood by me the whole time. Raising three girls to careless about who the world wants them to be and figuring out who they are on their own has so many challenges. To have a momma who battled societies images of women this year I had to think long and hard about what I showed them.

I have always chosen to keep it real. The skin. The reasons why it got so bad. Why it happened. Why I decided to change. And most of all unconditional love of my guy no matter how I looked and love of myself. But this isn’t about me. It is about an amazing family that continues to overcome life’s obstacles.

So without further chatter…I share the amazingness that was E party of five’s 2015.


Getting ready for New Years’s Holiday


If TN taught me one thing….it is to enjoy these moments. The ones where everyone is happy and smiling and no worries. This..these people…they are what matters always.



Me enjoying the view helping my guy as he was snow blowing my neighbors house. The previous winter I was trekking out there all by my lonesome cause he was sick. MVD gave me this back.


She may have been our last and finale, but she keeps me young.


We all sport the “E bun” as my students call it. I love the smiles we created during this problem solving moment where we were trying to get all of our buns in the photo.



Baby Girl # 3 turned 6 and loved every minute of it. She rocked kindergarten. She became a 1st grader. She is growing up to my sadness. She became obsessed with shopkins, is still in love with swiss cheese and summer sausage and can read a chapter book all on her own.



Baby girl # 2 turned 11 and into a teenager. We see less and less of her. She is either with her friends, or in her digital world of her Ipad, minecraft or her music. She hangs out in her room on the regular. She is in advanced reading and math and pulling in straight A’s. She is probably the most like her momma. She loves to be in the kitchen with me and has the organizing skills and fashion taste of Martha Stewart.



And this one turned 14. How in the world I have had her for 14 years is beyond me. Where did all that time go? What a year she has had. I have watched the sometimes easy, sometimes hard process of her becoming a young lady. My guy and I have trust daily that we raised her right to make good and responsible decisions. It has been super fun to have front row seats to her growing into her own person. She loves music. To listen to it, to create it and to be in presence of it. She is in accelerated math and English. She is majorly in love with science. Can I tell you how many times I have heard about different chemical compounds and make ups? She got accepted in my school for her 9th grade year. We aren’t sure exactly where she is headed next year, but the girl has options and opportunities. She also is in the straight A club.


And this guy. The words get harder every year because I love him more every year. I never believed the day I married him I could love him more and now I look back and think of all the hurdles in life we have jumped together and this beautiful life we have created together despite those hurdles and I am grateful for him. He is my home. He is my base. He gives me unconditional love and support. More than I probably deserve sometimes. And more importantly….people often ask me if he just love the new “skinny” me. I just remember he has always had the same eyes for me no matter my size or look. To me that is speaking straight to my heart. I don’t need to be skinny, fat or ugly. I can just be me. That is priceless in the world. I am grateful that God has allowed us to remain a source of love and comfort to one another. Life isn’t always easy, but love is.


Our baby girls # 1 , 2 and 3 The Straight A’s.


Do you know I have single handedly kept the clementine business booming this year. I have eaten approximately 750 of these darlings? Yes I am serious.


With my Eggland’s Best egg’s not too far behind.


My classroom (really it is my students) remains my third place to be besides home and gym. It is my home away from home.


This is probably the place our family has hung out the most besides….


Culver’s which has served as our place to go when we need extra family time. We probably visit at least once a week. Some of it is for the fries, or the curds, but mostly it is for the ability it allows our family to eat together and not go broke.


The time I ran in the rain. How could I not take in this beauty?


Or taking every chance I can to cuddle my baby girl even when it was hot and sticky outside.


Or when my guy went to Iowa for a week and I couldn’t tell anyone but a few select few. How happy his girls were when he got back we decorated the whole house in his favorite color streamers.


The spring/summer piano recital


Baby girl # 3 graduating from Kindergarten. She was so proud of all of her hard work.


My ability to let go of the long stringy hair once I lost most of my weight. I said good bye and cut off 6 inches of hair that was surprisingly easy to let go of.


And I went deceptively darker with peekaboo highlights.


And my guy and I spent a full day at the cemetery that gave spark to an amazing idea that pray and hope leads me to an amazing endeavor in 2016. (Shhh! More details to come… 😉 )


Or October 7th National Trigeminal Neuralgia Awareness Day where we all surprised my guy. Friends and Family also joined in.


Our sweet wiener dog, Roxie, who inadvertently became my dog. I like her somewhat. But not like my guy likes her. But to his dismay, she only wants me. She follows me around the house, whines till I am there and waits in the recliner for me whenever I am not home. I don’t even like her to sleep with me, but every single night I go to sleep without her and midway through the night she climbs under my blankets and cuddles in for the rest of the night.


A birthday date with my love to finally take that design by a student for an addition to my tattoo and make it a reality.


5 hearts representing each of my precious family. 4 black hearts for myself and my baby girls. 1 teal heart for my guy and his TN. Surrounding my already there semi-colon. A reminder that even when you want to stop you have to choose to keep going because LOVE ALWAYS WINS!

Want proof?


A picture from Christmas Day that perfectly shows off each of our personalities. My # 1 showing us how to take selfies. Notice her hand on her hip. She always thinks she is in charge. # 2 showing off a goofy face because that is her gig. She likes to make goofy faces and make life feel a little less serious. My guy is who constantly wondering how he got so lucky to be surrounded by so much beauty and love. Myself who is the peace in the middle of it all. A center to the chaos. # 3 who is so mostly easy going and just wants to get the moment over with so she can get back to what she was doing. That is her “cheese” smile.


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