If I could tell the world just one thing
It would be that we’re all ok
And not to worry because worry is wasteful
And useless in times like these
I will not be made useless
I won’t be idled with despair
I will gather myself around my faith
For light does the darkness most fear
Dear readers…school started this week which means I am back to full bladders, tired eyes and brains. It also means my writing is intermittent. It will happen, but I gotta rebound. The other day I promised #3 McDonalds breakfast for her last day of summer break. As I was chauffeuring her and her sister to my mother in laws I realized this was the beginning of my year long marathon of momming, teaching, being a graduate student, wife and all the glorious and not so glorious titles I hold.
My girls were in the car with me and the temptation to be rushed and hurried was there. Sometimes that throws me into fits of yelling, or apologizing for not being a better mom or not being there enough. I realized never do I show them the positive side to myself in these circumstances…especially the morning car rides. As we got to the window to pay I told the cashier I wanted to pay for the order behind us. I didn’t tell the girls I was doing this and really didn’t plan on it. It just happened and their faces lit up. My #2 smiles big and says, “Oh I have always wanted to do this. I just want to see their face.”
They wondered aloud why I did this and I responded that a year ago we were making a similar drive and I made the exact same Mcd promise to them and that as I was getting in line to pay for our food another car and I got there at the same time and I was nasty. I was fussing at the car and fussing at girls for running late. They got in line in front of us and ending up paying for our food. I felt humbled and embarrassed and I promised myself I would repay the kindness. I waited for that time and it came.
But it wasn’t really the repayment I was after. I wanted them to feel what it feels like to do something kind for another when you truly have no reason to. I moved about my busy day and didn’t think about it again until tonight when I sat down thinking about this week. I am glad we started our day and year off that way. I am also grateful to the guy who made sure he let the girls know how grateful he was for our random act of kindness. For that moment during that day we knew nothing other than making someone else happy. It felt good.
So Jewel was right readers….”In the end only kindness matters…” -MR